Our dossier is done!!! Now, I'm sure some of you just thought, "What's a dossier?" I'm pretty sure Rob still doesn't know that word. A dossier consists of all the info about our family that is going to be sent to China in order for them to officially approve for us to be Fiona's parents. It contains our birth certificates, marriage certificate, home study write up, employment letters, police reports, financial statement, physical reports, approval by our government to go ahead, pictures, and an adoption petition describing the child we wish to adopt. Some of these documents had to be purchased from various government agencies. Others were created by me. Each document required a notarization, authentication by the Secretary of State's office, and another authentication by the Chinese Consulate.
Today, I picked up the final two pieces of our dossier from the Chinese Consulate and put them in the mail. That's it. I'm done. So much paperwork that I've had to keep track of for the last six months, and, now, it is all gone. It's kind of a crazy feeling. I've been carrying it all around in the same bag, praying nothing gets lost. Now, it is no longer in my hands. Awesome!
Luckily, I sent most of the dossier last month so our agency has already had time to review those parts. These last two bits shouldn't take them long to go over. Then, all the pieces will be bound together, translated, and sent to China.
Then, we wait for the acronyms. This adoption world is full of so many acronyms. We have already submitted our LOI (Letter of Intent) for Fiona. China received that and gave us our PA (pre-approval) for Fiona. This was the point where they locked her file for us with the rule that we must complete our Dossier by October. Now, we wait for LID (Log in Date, I think?). That's when China has received our Dossier and gotten us into their system. Then, we wait for LOA (Letter of Acceptance). That's when we're officially approved by China to adopt Fiona. Finally, we'll get our TA (travel approval). That signifies they're ready for us to come get her.
That's a while away at this point, though, and we have a lot of waiting coming up. I akin it to that point in pregnancy when the nausea has subsided, your belly is not getting in the way yet, and you've just started thinking about what you'll need to buy before the baby come. Your just waiting. Not much else to do.
Although, I do need to learn some Chinese.
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
What is Fiona's Need? Other Than the Need to be Adopted of Course.
When searching for a child, Rob and I deliberately looked for a girl with orthopedic issues. Taking on a child with special needs is a challenge so we figured that we could make it easier on ourselves by finding a child who could share doctors with Elliot. After all, she has a pretty awesome team. Why not let another child benefit from them as well?
We were open to another child with Arthrogryposis (AMC), but we were a little leery as well. I'll be honest and admit that I wasn't sure if my back could take another kid with AMC. We even requested the file of a baby boy with AMC from one agency but agreed that his needs would be too much added stress for us and would take away too much from Elliot. Luckily, that beautiful little boy found a loving family and has already made his way to the US. I know this because I am Facebook friends with his mom. How awesome is that!?!
There was also a part of me that was scared that, if we had two kids with the same condition, one would excel more than the other at certain tasks causing self-esteem issues (Yes, I am aware that I over-analyze everything). I liked the idea of each girl having her own condition. It might sound silly, but the reality is that there are so many kids out there needing to be adopted that you just have to draw some lines to help limit your choices.
At the beginning of our process, our agency sent us the file of a little girl with suspected dwarfism and some very real abnormal brain scans. We were completely on board with dwarfism, but the brain issues scared us. We weren't ready to learn how to deal with all the new possibilities that condition might bring to our world. After a couple days and a lot of talking, we decided to pass on the little girl to the next family in line. I am happy to say that that little girl appears to be on her way to her family because her file never showed up on our agency's website.
That brings me back to Fiona, who we did find on our agency's site. This is where all the kiddos go who are hard to place, sometimes because of multiple needs, sometimes because of severe needs, sometimes because of older age. I tried to be patient and wait for another file to be sent to us, but I couldn't help checking the "Waiting Children" once in a while. In April, while Rob was traveling with Conan in Chicago, a few new girls popped up on the agency's page. This is the picture I saw:
How could you not immediately fall in love? I sent Rob a message and emailed our agency asking for a copy of her file. Rob was equally smitten but, sadly, so were a lot of other people. Since our agency will only give one family a file at a time, we were added to a waiting list just to look at it. Every day, I checked my email and checked the agency's site to see if she would be added to the "My Family Found Me" section. I'll admit I actually checked like 30 times a day. A few days later, I was told we were next on the list. TWO WEEKS LATER!!! The other family finally passed on her file, and it was ours.
My first reaction while reading over her notes and charts was, "This is it?" So many families had turned her down, and she was a perfectly healthy baby. Like Elliot, her needs are purely orthopedic. It is something that happened to her during the development of her body that was permanent but not degenerative. She would never get sick because of her condition. She would just have to learn to live with a different type of body, just like her sister. While these words are not used in her chart, it is believed that Fiona lost her right foot and some of her fingers to Amniotic Banding. Here is some info about it here:
Amniotic Band Info
Her hands, she will more than likely just learn to live with. She can already feed herself, pick up toys, hold onto things to stand. Her right leg will probably need a prosthesis, especially since there is a length discrepancy from the missing foot. Maybe one day, she will need minor surgery to help a prosthesis fit better or to relieve pressure at the banding site. That's it. To Rob and I, that seems like no big deal to get to squeeze that little face for the rest of our lives. So, we did NOT pass on Fiona's file, and we are grateful for all the families that did (because we know firsthand that it is not an easy thing to do). I am sure that they will all find their child just like we found ours.
We were open to another child with Arthrogryposis (AMC), but we were a little leery as well. I'll be honest and admit that I wasn't sure if my back could take another kid with AMC. We even requested the file of a baby boy with AMC from one agency but agreed that his needs would be too much added stress for us and would take away too much from Elliot. Luckily, that beautiful little boy found a loving family and has already made his way to the US. I know this because I am Facebook friends with his mom. How awesome is that!?!
There was also a part of me that was scared that, if we had two kids with the same condition, one would excel more than the other at certain tasks causing self-esteem issues (Yes, I am aware that I over-analyze everything). I liked the idea of each girl having her own condition. It might sound silly, but the reality is that there are so many kids out there needing to be adopted that you just have to draw some lines to help limit your choices.
At the beginning of our process, our agency sent us the file of a little girl with suspected dwarfism and some very real abnormal brain scans. We were completely on board with dwarfism, but the brain issues scared us. We weren't ready to learn how to deal with all the new possibilities that condition might bring to our world. After a couple days and a lot of talking, we decided to pass on the little girl to the next family in line. I am happy to say that that little girl appears to be on her way to her family because her file never showed up on our agency's website.
That brings me back to Fiona, who we did find on our agency's site. This is where all the kiddos go who are hard to place, sometimes because of multiple needs, sometimes because of severe needs, sometimes because of older age. I tried to be patient and wait for another file to be sent to us, but I couldn't help checking the "Waiting Children" once in a while. In April, while Rob was traveling with Conan in Chicago, a few new girls popped up on the agency's page. This is the picture I saw:
How could you not immediately fall in love? I sent Rob a message and emailed our agency asking for a copy of her file. Rob was equally smitten but, sadly, so were a lot of other people. Since our agency will only give one family a file at a time, we were added to a waiting list just to look at it. Every day, I checked my email and checked the agency's site to see if she would be added to the "My Family Found Me" section. I'll admit I actually checked like 30 times a day. A few days later, I was told we were next on the list. TWO WEEKS LATER!!! The other family finally passed on her file, and it was ours.
My first reaction while reading over her notes and charts was, "This is it?" So many families had turned her down, and she was a perfectly healthy baby. Like Elliot, her needs are purely orthopedic. It is something that happened to her during the development of her body that was permanent but not degenerative. She would never get sick because of her condition. She would just have to learn to live with a different type of body, just like her sister. While these words are not used in her chart, it is believed that Fiona lost her right foot and some of her fingers to Amniotic Banding. Here is some info about it here:
Amniotic Band Info
Her hands, she will more than likely just learn to live with. She can already feed herself, pick up toys, hold onto things to stand. Her right leg will probably need a prosthesis, especially since there is a length discrepancy from the missing foot. Maybe one day, she will need minor surgery to help a prosthesis fit better or to relieve pressure at the banding site. That's it. To Rob and I, that seems like no big deal to get to squeeze that little face for the rest of our lives. So, we did NOT pass on Fiona's file, and we are grateful for all the families that did (because we know firsthand that it is not an easy thing to do). I am sure that they will all find their child just like we found ours.
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